DAVE

Splutters, blusters, and otherwise rages about the state of the world and every asinine waste of oxygen in it

MEG

Desperate to stem the flow of murderous expletives

Hey, look! You never even opened this package from Amazon!

The package is small and light. She picks it up in one hand and hesitantly proffers it to DAVE, like a treat to a mad dog

DAVE

Accepts the box but does not open it. Visible storm clouds ring his head

Oh. It’s just my Keri Russell figurine from the last STAR WARS.

MEG

With forced, almost manic brightness

Well, I bet she can cheer you up!

DAVE

Gloomily regards the box in his lap

I doubt it. It’s not even her whole face. She has a helmet on.